[sasquatch2]

Those who denounce this mother's actions are indeed part of the problem----we should sell their car as well! DONE!

[RUEZ]

sasquatch2 sasquatch2:

Those who denounce this mother's actions are indeed part of the problem----we should sell their car as well! DONE!

I denounce the mothers humiliation of her son, not the selling of his car. Her ad had no merit other than to increase his embarassment. Just selling his car would have been discipline enough.

[Brenda]

sasquatch2 sasquatch2:

Those who denounce this mother's actions are indeed part of the problem----we should sell their car as well! DONE!

I haven't seen anyone here who didn't agree with her selling the car...

[Tricks]

I denounce a stupid impractical poorly worded rule. Not the selling of the car.

[saturn_656]

what a witch

[ShepherdsDog]

$1:

Discipline is always appropriate when dealing with a child.

umm........did anyone else read the part about him being 19? While he is a minor in Iowa, 19 isn't a child. I'd already been in the military for a year and a half by the time I was 19.

[DerbyX]

lily lily:

Tricks Tricks:

I denounce a stupid impractical poorly worded rule. Not the selling of the car.

No booze in the car..... that seems pretty simple and straightforward to me.... especially since he's underage.

Will it change in 2 years? Who cares?
That's not relevant.

Is the mother prepared for the fallout? How about years later if he says "One slip up and you never see your grandkids again?"

Extreme, I know, but if the mother is given to extreme reactions then she should be prepared for some in return.

[ShepherdsDog]

$1:

If he's still living at home, he has to abide by house rules.

I agree with that, it 's just the tone that this is a child that is being discussed. If mom bought the car, then she has the right to sell it because she was essentially loaning it to him with conditions.

[Tricks]

lily lily:

Tricks Tricks:

I denounce a stupid impractical poorly worded rule. Not the selling of the car.

No booze in the car..... that seems pretty simple and straightforward to me.... especially since he's underage.

Will it change in 2 years? Who cares?
That's not relevant.

Yeah, it is. Another thing, what if he is a designated driver for one of his buddies who is 21, and he is brining a case of beer. Whoops, no booze in the car. Stupid rule.

[DerbyX]

lily lily:

If he's still living at home, he has to abide by house rules.

Many a child has left home for good under such quotations and of course there is the matter of a lifetime of relationships to be considered.

"do this or else" is likely not new to the 18 year old and if its still be used then that is what she will have taught him.

Ultimatums.

Not a good llesson to pass on.

Continuing my last point, why shouldn't he return that sentiment in later years.

"I'm not coming home for the holidays because I won't stay under a roof that dictates to me".

"No, mom, you can't come up to see the kids because I'm to busy and don't need a lecture on how to raise them properly".

"No, mom. You will not buy my kids toys I told you not to because I said so. If you can't abide by my rules then you won't see them".

Inflexibility and rigidness is quite possibly the very lesson she will pass on.

[ShepherdsDog]

Even if the booze wasn't his, and it was a passanger's, the driver is still responsible for the content of the vehicle.

[Tricks]

lily lily:

Tricks Tricks:

lily lily:

Tricks Tricks:

I denounce a stupid impractical poorly worded rule. Not the selling of the car.

No booze in the car..... that seems pretty simple and straightforward to me.... especially since he's underage.

Will it change in 2 years? Who cares?
That's not relevant.

Yeah, it is.

How?

Because if the mother is being this unreasonable, then chances are it won't change.

$1:

$1:

Another thing, what if he is a designated driver for one of his buddies who is 21, and he is brining a case of beer. Whoops, no booze in the car. Stupid rule.

If he felt it was a stupid rule, or if he felt exceptions could be made, he could have discussed this with his parents.... you know, like adults do?

No, that's not what parents do to their kids. They say the kids are wrong and they are right rule doesn't change.

[Tricks]

ShepherdsDog ShepherdsDog:

Even if the booze wasn't his, and it was a passanger's, the driver is still responsible for the content of the vehicle.

So if I go pick up someone when I'm 18 and they are 19, I can be charged for having unopened alcohol in the car?

[Tricks]

lily lily:

DerbyX DerbyX:

lily lily:

If he's still living at home, he has to abide by house rules.

Many a child has left home for good under such quotations and of course there is the matter of a lifetime of relationships to be considered.

"do this or else" is likely not new to the 18 year old and if its still be used then that is what she will have taught him.

Ultimatums.

Not a good llesson to pass on.

Continuing my last point, why shouldn't he return that sentiment in later years.

"I'm not coming home for the holidays because I won't stay under a roof that dictates to me".

"No, mom, you can't come up to see the kids because I'm to busy and don't need a lecture on how to raise them properly".

"No, mom. You will not buy my kids toys I told you not to because I said so. If you can't abide by my rules then you won't see them".

Inflexibility and rigidness is quite possibly the very lesson she will pass on.

You get all that from "no booze in the car"?

I would agree completely if it were here, where the drinking age is 18 or 19... but he's still 2 years away from being able to legally buy or drink alcohol.

If he doesn't like it, he can always move out.... but then, he'd have to take even more responsibility for his life.

The guy has probably been drinking for the past 4 years anyways. Parents were just too retarded to figure it out.

[DerbyX]

lily lily:

$1:

Is the mother prepared for the fallout? How about years later if he says "One slip up and you never see your grandkids again?"

Extreme, I know, but if the mother is given to extreme reactions then she should be prepared for some in return.

I see your point, but I think "no booze in the car" for an underage driver is a fair rule, and not extreme at all.

The rule? No. The punishment, yes.

Thats the hallmark of inflexibility. Everybody has rules and punishments but when the punishment is an extreme one for something that is quite frankly to be expected let alone explainable then it isn't fair.

Regardless, she is simply teaching her son a lesson and that lesson may very well come back to haunt her.

Will she consider it a harsh punishment if he decides that the punishment for her disobeying his "rule" about not spoiling the kids is cesation of visits.

That will be perfectly within his right. She will have violated his "rule" and she will then face whatever punishment he decides.

What lesson does she really want to pass on?

That is what she should be thinking about and quite frankly I think its the wrong lesson.